there's no crying in baseball...



there's no crying in baseball or in any other facet of your life, that's if you're a man, right? why the heck is this the case in our society today? it saddens me to see the results of this mentality in relationships.

so, from my experience this is what happens. family Doe is comprised of man and woman. x event happens. woman is hurt. woman expresses it. man is hurt as well. man doesn't know how to express his pain. consequently, man shuts down. woman thinks man doesn't care. woman is hurt by man. woman pursues man. man withdraws. women thinks man doesn't care. :(

contrary to my gender's belief about emotions, sometimes the way to resolve emotionally potent experiences is just to feel the emotion. i'm not saying you let the emotions override other facets of your life, but acknowledging the emotion and allowing yourself to feel it is how you "fix" them.

i know that for a lot of men emotions are scary. in a lot of cases emotions make them question how well they fulfill their roles as provider, protector and so forth. thus, it becomes easier to ignore your feelings and those of others. this just isn't the way to handle them. it will push people away.

i hate it when people do this, but maybe if you are reading this you can direct me to the proper source. i feel like i've heard from a seventy that the greatest thing Joseph Smith learned from the first vision wasn't that God had a body or that the traditional godhead doctrine was false, but that God loves and continues to love His children on earth. i like this. i like it because it conveys the idea that God continues to be love and to emanate love. and to me, that makes all the difference in my life.

i close by saying quoting President Monson (Finding Joy in the Journey, Oct 2008).

"Stresses in our lives come regardless of our circumstances. We must deal with them the best we can. But we should not let them get in the way of what is most important—and what is most important almost always involves the people around us. Often we assume that they must know how much we love them. But we should never assume; we should let them know. Wrote William Shakespeare, “They do not love that do not show their love.”3 We will never regret the kind words spoken or the affection shown. Rather, our regrets will come if such things are omitted from our relationships with those who mean the most to us.

Despite the changes which come into our lives and with gratitude in our hearts, may we fill our days—as much as we can—with those things which matter most. May we cherish those we hold dear and express our love to them in word and in deed."

I add that we ought to love those around us enough to share with them all of our feelings